Sunday, October 3

I'm Going to Give it a Try

I like to talk, but even more than talking I love to write. People who know me may be shocked to learn that I like writing more than talking since I can babble on for hours and hours.  Writing is more cathartic for me.  I started writing when I was young.  I would journal about life until my brother found my journal and humiliated me.  I then destroyed all my writings.  Only a few pathetic poems I came across in junior high notebooks remain.  I didn't start journaling again until I went away to college.  My writing then was sporadic.  Then I got married and my husband and I wrote letters to each other for the year I finished college and he was away working.  We have kept all those correspondences and some day I want to organize it all into some order.  It is one of my projects on my to do list.

This blog was on that same to do list.  It made it onto the list about 2 years ago when I moved.  Then it surfaced again when I started my facebook page.  Recently I have been sending more and more e-mails to friends and family that are lengthy biographies of my children's lives.  I can't get on the phone for more than 15 minutes without my children demanding my attention.  It is typical behavior at their age.  As an outlet for my need to communicate I have posted on message boards and typed lengthy e-mails.  Now, my children are conditioned to leave Mommy alone when she is doing her homework. Yes, anytime I am on the computer typing rapidly, my children believe I am doing homework.  I haven't felt the need to correct them yet.

My husband received his degree over the Internet.  That is how the whole homework association started.  Of course it doesn't help the perception when I do all our home finances online and track our budget with Quicken.  I started bargain shopping with some favorite websites like slickdeals, woot, and one sale a day.  Now there are blogs about savings, freebies and coupons that I follow.  Plus, all the time it takes to print out all the coupons, sign up for savings and receive freebies.  I find new recipes to cook and magazine articles to read. Then there is always facebook, the black hole of time. I no longer have time to watch television.  How do I think I will have time to blog?

My ultimate goal would be to have all more family and friends read my blog.  I would no longer have to send out individual e-mails, post new statuses, or up load photos to Walgreens.  I really should say it is a dream not a goal.  The chances that my Mother or Aunts will read my blog are pretty darn slim. Heck, they are just getting used to e-mail.  I still can't send a PDF file to my Mom.

Actually, I was thinking that this blog would be less expensive than therapy.  At the rate at which I think I burn out the people around me with my chatter, I figure I am going to have to hire someone to listen to me.  I have paid people to listen to me before, sure it helps, but it doesn't last.  Maybe if I blog I will get better focus on what I need to say.  I have tons to say and it doesn't always need to be said.  Yet, I feel the need to purge it from my brain.  Look at how long this first post is!  Really I could have said the same thing with at least 1/2 the number of words and sentences that I did.

If you decide to torture yourself and read my dribble, please be tolerant of my lack of grammatical structure, babbling on and on, and political incorrectness.  I'm sure I will offend everyone at some time, bore others, and appear stupid at times or most of the time.  I'm still undecided about how honest I should be.  There are many dimensions to my inner thoughts and how much I am willing to share is still being debated.  Plus, how often can I post or will I post.  Today I could keep typing for hours.  Other days I'm sure I will not feel the need to share or have nothing to share. So off I go into the world of blogging.  I pray that it isn't a complete failure.

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